Too Small To Make a Difference

A Few Things Before (a perhaps permanent) Hiatus

2006-07-08T09:23:00.000-05:00

I am purportedly studying for the bar exam. It sucks. Everyone warned me that it would suck, but I brushed off their complaints as so much hyperbolia...after all, these are the same people who warned me that first year of law school would work me to death. (Not even to sickness, or pallor, or depression. Maybe a bit of anxiety but really, that's par for Pooja's course.)

Nonetheless, the bar really does suck. Unlike law school exams, which were generally open-book, one subject, and often (freakily) fun, for the bar exam there are: 1) no notes 2) no pontificating 3) a dozen and a half subjects. Argy, argy, arg.

That's my ostensible reason for signing off-- to study. But, if you've been clicking refresh, futiley, as I have for the past three weeks, well, you'll know that I am so off blogging. Several reasons: First, I'd like to invest my energies in other writing (at least after I stop writing 300-word essays that begin, "This case shall be governed by the Uniform Commercial Code of Contracts, article 2"). Second, and far more importantly, I am totally off the real world. Everything just sucks. I'm quite happy, internally, but the world makes me miser-fucking-able. Things I can barely bear to think about (yech!):

1) The accelerating gap between rich and poor in the US, which seems to have swallowed anything that resembles a middle class

2) Kaavya Vishwanathan. So much about this story was sad before the plagiarism charges struck. A book "packaged" on Madison Avenue, written by a Superstriver whose abiding passions were Gucci bags, Mary Kate Olsen, and investment banking, occupying full page spreads in newspapers and primo shelf space in bookstores. What does that say about the state of book and newspaper publishing? THEN the fact that the poor kid was so pressured to perfect her frou-frou fluff that she actually copied someone else's. Poor kid-- not only was she brutal on herself, but she had exceptionally bad literary taste.

3) Guantanamo, and the Supreme Court's tepid ruling on it. If only Kennedy had the balls to say that the dungeon violates the Genever Conventions. (Also, see Road to Guantanamo if you haven't. I expected to cringe at the brutality; I was unprepared for the ineptitude exhibted by U.S. military. It'd be comical in a Hellerian way, if only it weren't (for the most part) accurate.)

4) Iraq, Iraq, Iraq. I don't know that I will ever stop mourning the war and the terror it's unleashed on the Iraqi people.

5) Missing my friends. I wouldn't sacrifice being with Jonathan to live in a more Pooja-friend-rich place, but damn, I miss you all and many, many others who don't read this. Please visit. Cambridge is actually salubrious for another couple of months.

La Tourbillon de la Vie

2006-06-18T15:11:00.000-05:00

Jonathan and I have become obsessed with the song La Tourbillon de la Vie. It consists of two alternating melodies, each, impossibly, sweeter than the last. I suppose its melodic structure reflects its narrative, about two lovers who meet and part and meet and part a nd finally meet.

Vanessa Paradis has a rendition, but Jeanne Moreau's, in the Truffaut film Jules et Jim-- available here-- wholly captivates.

Acts of War

2006-06-12T08:22:00.000-05:00

About those prisoners who committed suicide at Gitmo:

"They are smart, they are creative, they are committed," Admiral Harris said. "They have no regard for life, neither ours nor their own. I believe this was not an act of desperation, but an act of asymmetrical warfare waged against us."

I'm speechless.

Let's see here. We lock up hundreds of men in a lawless zone and tell them that they have no legal rights and they might never leave, but don't tell them what they did to deserve it. We rob them of everything that makes life worth living-- love, family, sunshine, the sense that there is a moral order and, most of all, hope. And then, when they quite reasonably give up, we rob them even of a dignified death.

I think I am going to be sick.

Bye Bye Law School

2006-05-22T18:51:00.000-05:00

I turned in my last paper on Friday. I was in a hotel room in Monte Carlo, where Jonathan was at a conference and the cappuccinos cost, like, 10 euros. It's really hard to pull an all nighter when the coffee's so expensive. I went to an Italian shop a mile from our hotel to buy bread, cheese and fruit, and thus to avoid either starving or bankrupting myself, and the bill came to 36 euros.

I didn't much like Monte Carlo. To be sure, I didn't see much because I was writing that paper, and everyone was tres gentil (et tres patiente avec moi quand j'essaye parler francais), but still, everything seemed to me to be about money. Lamborghini, Maserati, Rolls-Royce, Bentley and Ferrari all had showrooms on l'Avenue de Princess Grace and Rue de Prince Albert, etc., etc. Many of the hotel guests arrived in such automobiles. The women dressed like fashionable trash. The men leered. All of the place's natural beauty-- houses built into a mountain overlooking the insane blue of the sea-- was obscured by the glitz and cheeze. On the other hand, as a casino town, Monte Carlo has none of Vegas' positive attributes: $5.99 buffets dinners and open bars on the floor.

The trip was otherwise fantastic. We spent the weekend with my aunt, who lives in a tiny village. It's the platonic ideal of bucolic-ness. Green pastures filled with cows as fluffy as Snuffleluffagus, forsythia hanging from roofs, blue bells dotting meadows. My aunt, Latu Bua (that's short for Lalita, her first name, and "bua," which means "father's sister"), was as always the consummate and most loving hostess. She fed us Champagne; mangos; piping hot, fluffy pooris with chana and alu sabzi; Champagne. She gave us gifts (Indian kurtas and a skirt for me; cologne and aftershave for Jonathan). We hung out with her, her son--my devilishly handsome cousin Manu (who'd flown in from the Hague for the weekend)--and her daughter-in-law-- my lovely cousin-in-law Shadi (who had come to London from Hong Kong for business). My only regret of the trip is that I didn't spend more time with Latu Bua and the other Sachdevas. I hope I will go back soon.

We flew to Nice on Tuesday, getting (we thought) some movie industry bigwigs on our flight. One woman was definitely a Bollywood star-- very glam, long, layered black hair, lots of kohl, Saran-wrap-tight jeans and knee length boots. None of us had the nerve to ask her who she was, or to ask for her autograph, but I did try to make conversation with her mother. Unfortunately, the mother seemed not to speak English.

After the yuck that was Monaco, Jonathan and I drove a Peugeot (sounds much like my name) to Maillane, a town in Provence, to visit my college friend Julia. Although Jonathan and I had some car trouble (the car was a sort of clutchless manual shift, which was a slight problem on the steep hills of Monte Carlo), some toll booth trouble (till we discovered they take credit cards) and some directional trouble (damn those far-apart exits on A7!), we pulled up at the gate of Julia's farmhouse around midnight. Unfortunately, we could not figure out how to open the gate or ring the bell. Finally, in a fit of pique and much to Jonathan's chagrin, I climbed over the gate and ran up to the brightly lit window, where Mina (another friend who's staying there) and two of her friends were having some wine. I gave them quite the scare. It turns out we were supposed to go to the second gate, which has some buzzer. That this Provence farmhouse has two gates gives you some impression of how ridiculous and big it is, and if it doesn't, telling you that it has a six or seven bedrooms, two kitchens, a Turkish sauna, a pool, and a tennis court might. The remainder of the weekend involved at least five rounds of Kir Royales and several bottles of wine, a large and lush lunch with lots of cheese, and an extravagant dinner-- truffles, foie gras, three desserts, the works--somewhere, courtesy of our gracious hosts.

And now, alas, I am back at home. It is fabulous and weird. For the first time in a very long time I have no school work; no work work-- nothing to do except organize my life, read novels and magazines, watch movies and go for walks. Bar courses will take a bit of time, but only that.

MANGOES [sic] TO USA via DHL

2006-05-10T07:54:00.000-05:00

I tried to make a pun in the headline but it didn't catch. This yum article on mangos reveals that soon, we in the United States will be able to get Indian mangos--Alphonos, too!-- at the height of the season. By next year. Faranghi reporter gets lesson on mango-eating, below:

Inside knowledge always helps, so this reporter called upon Deepanjana Pal, a wine critic in Mumbai who is just as enthusiastic about mangoes. The most important lesson: How to eat a mango, presented in a three-part mime. She first holds out a cupped hand, in which sits the imaginary glistening orange oval of a whole peeled mango; she then deftly flicks her hand at the wrist to propel the phantom mango against her mouth, which gets busy sucking the flesh down to the seed; finally, outrageously, she deploys the full length of her tongue to lick her arm, elbow to wrist, to recapture an inevitable trickle of invisible mango juice.
"That," she says after a long moment's rapture with a fruit that's not even there, "is the best bit." She goes on to speculate that there is something alchemical in the mingling of sweetest mango juice with a salty sheen of sweat.
(Later, a local driver reacted with horror to the mime. "So you don't eat them like that?" I ask. "Well yes, at home, of course," he says. "But not in the streets! People will think that's where you live.")

Yum yum yum, give me give me give me! Also, that's hot.

America Oversleeps By Eighteen Months

2006-05-09T19:32:00.001-05:00

Bush's approval rating has slipped to an all-time low of 31 percent.

The poll showed a continued decline in support for the war, the issue that has most eaten into Mr. Bush's public support. The percentage of respondents who said going to war in Iraq was the correct decision slipped to a new low of 39 percent, down from 47 percent in January. Two-thirds said they have little or no confidence that Mr. Bush will be able to successfully end the war there.
Mr. Bush's political strength continues to dissipate. About two-thirds of voters said that Mr. Bush does not share their priorities, up from just over half right before his reelection in 2004. About two thirds said and that the country is in worse shape than it was when he came to power six years ago. Forty-two percent of respondents say they consider Mr. Bush a strong leader, a drop of 11 points since January.

Helloooooo?????? Why couldn't the undecideds in Ohio and Pennsylvania etc figure this out in November of 2004?

The Joys of Bluebooking

2006-05-09T07:37:00.000-05:00

One of the footnotes in my 3L paper-- to be turned in today!-- is:

Kanye West, Gold-Digger (featuring Jamie Foxx), on LATE REGISTRATION (Roc-a-Fella Records 2005) (advising men, “We want prenup, we want prenup…It’s something that you need to have ‘cause when she leave yo’ ass she gonna leave with half").

Gotta love law school.

Don't Expect Any Lyricism Here. Just Cut to the Links.

2006-05-02T23:01:00.000-05:00

I am not supposed to be reading media gossip right now, let alone to be posting. I have papers I'm flailing around about like a flopping fish. But this is the best thing I've read in, like, 2 years. Colbert is AMAZING. He spent 20 minutes at the White House Press Dinner, on the dais, next to W, lambasting him and the POS press corps. You NEED to read the entire thing-- it's ludicrous and truthful. Is there a word that captures both of those adjectives?

Predictably, press persons have gone ballistic. Apparently Colbert was too critical, he crossed some line or something. That's sour, soulless grapes. Where were they three years ago?

[In the near future (read: after school), I will dedicate a week of posts to Her Most Excellent Divess, Helen Thomas.]

note from the underground

2006-04-30T11:37:00.000-05:00

I had sworn off blogging till I finish all my schoolwork. But this obituary of John Kenneth Galbraith was 2 Good 2 let pass without my remarking.

The obituary is excellent and inspiring and awe-inspiring, too. An earnest, wry, scary smart liberal-- gotta love it. Everything he did was OTT. just his physical statute 80 inches tall (tried to enlist in the army during WWII but was rejected for his height) and near-century-long lifespan are daunting. The obit's best when it showcases JKG's wit:

A major influence on him was the caustic social commentary he found in [Thorstein] Veblen's [19th century] "Theory of the Leisure Class." Mr. Galbraith called Veblen one of American history's most astute social scientists, but also acknowledged that he tended to be overcritical.
"I've thought to resist this tendency," Mr. Galbraith said, "but in other respects Veblen's influence on me has lasted long. One of my greatest pleasures in my writing has come from the thought that perhaps my work might annoy someone of comfortably pretentious position. Then comes the realization that such people rarely read."

One more thing--I just discovered this character named Francois de La Rouchefoucauld, a 17th century French memoirist. But his real passion was maxims; he spent years polishing them to perfect pure gems. See here.

He's a Maxim Master. Or Master Maxim. Or a Maximizer. Or Master Maximizer.

Back to paper.

Brew Ha Ha

2006-04-18T08:26:00.000-05:00

Breaking: Lauren sends reports of a warm-beverage scuffle at the New York State legislature. Apparently State Senator Ada Smith, of Queens, has been stripped of her state car and a $9,000 stipend for a pattern of abusive behavior that features throwing coffee at her aides. Hairpiece pulling, too.

"Senator Smith, a nine-term incumbent, said last week that she was a tea drinker, not a coffee drinker, and she flatly denied throwing coffee at Ms. Jackson."

Equally dubious, but more florid, defenses come from Smith's lawyer, one Ravi Batra. He protested the violation of Ms. Smith's constitutional presumption of innocence. Then he called the accusations "'a felonious hoax'" and questioned why there were no coffee stains in Senator Smith's office. He said that at his invitation, investigators from the Albany district attorney's office will come to the office on Wednesday to search for physical evidence."

Only in New York, kids. Only in New York.

Dispatch from Haiti

2006-04-11T09:53:00.000-05:00

So, encouraged by an article in--- of all fora-- the tweedy New York Review of Books, I have ventured into the world of Daily Kos, whose founder, according to Tweedy, has presented "the most ambitious, interesting, and hopeful venture in progressive politics in decades."

Fortuitously, one poster had written an entry about Haiti, my favorite dystopia. She was vacationing in the Dominican Republic and stumbled haphazardly across the border, enticed by the un-PC prospects of cockfighting and voodoo. Instead, she found hovels and kids with dead eyes. For instance, when one member of her tour group tossed some baseball hats to the congregation of children outside the bus,

it got really bad really fast. They were fist fighting in the dirt over a hat. One of them broke away and the others gave chase. They caught him and they fought some more. Running, chasing and fighting until we couldn't see them in the dust. It was about this point that I took my trusty flask out of my backpack and started drinking.

I learned from readers' comments that a new documentary about Haiti, by a Danish first-time director, is on its way. Word is that it's pretty anti-Aristide.

More on Haiti later.

Apropos of Nothing

2006-04-07T09:48:00.000-05:00

I've been meaning to post on a couple of movies for a while.

The first is Mutual Appreciation, directed by Andrew Bujalski. It's remarkably sensitive, registering emotional frequencies that most films miss, and true and generous and kind. And even better than his first feature, Funny Ha Ha, which got rave reviews last year--- two New York Times critics named it one of the 10 best films of 2005. Today's the last day you can buy a DVD, which the director will send you personally from Jamaica Plain; it's going to be officially released soon.

The second is Ingmar Bergman's six-episode series, Scenes from a Marriage, which I watched on the pretext of doing research for my 3L paper.

Each episode is about two people struggling to become with each other. It's hard to watch sometimes, just as marriages are hard:

Marianne: If only we could meet as the people we were meant to be and not as people trying to play the parts others have assigned us.

Johan: That’s impossible. We start putting on those masks as infants

Can't describe well, sorry. But it's stunning and beautiful. Rent it, and get the TV version, not the edited movie version.

Much Adoing

2006-04-07T09:14:00.000-05:00

When I read a headline that says, "Cheney's Aide Says Bush Approved Leak," my spirits lift.

They promptly sink when I learn that said leak was unrelated to covert CIA agents. It was just more (dis)information about Iraq's search for nuclear materials, stuff that was declassified a week later. What a tease!

I can't see what the big deal is here. Sure, "authorized leak" is an oxymoron, but every president has done it. We've known for a while that the Bush administration is particularly effective at turning the media into its mouthpiece. I understand, too, that President Bush has castigated leakers in the past, and that this exposes him as a hypocrite. But hypocrisy is the least of his sins!

Am I missing something here?

Spring Fever (and Sore Throat, Headache, Dizzyness)

2006-04-04T22:46:00.000-05:00

I am in the process of recovering from a very nasty cold-flu-type thing. My sinuses drip like a slow-melting icicle and my metaphors hurt almost as much as my head and gulllet combined. The only upside of this is my diet: Today I have eaten seven oranges, a packet of cough drops, some yogurt and approximately one dozen Fudgsicles.

I blame United Airlines, which-- thanks to "weather" delays and general incompetence-- turned a five-hour trip from Clinton, Iowa, to Cambridge into a 24-hour-long ordeal. I will refrain from reliving the experience, which ended yesterday, on blog. Just know that you should avoid the airline totally.

A Terrific News Day and Some Delusional Self-Promotion

2006-03-30T09:47:00.000-05:00

Jill Carroll's free!! YAY!!!!!!

I am pleased to report that the young, Arabic-speaking, do-gooder journalist was released today with her heath, spirits, and her grace in tact. Her kidnappers were good to her, she says! (Stockholm Syndrome anyone? Actually, this bleeding-heart liberal may have a worse clotting problem than I do.)

During her three months of captivity, the Christian Science Monitor freelancer became a sort of international celebrity, her story chronicled by leading outlets from from Le Monde to Al- Jazeera to the Times to the BBC to Too Small.

Yay!!!!! Yay!!!!! YAY!!!

Manipulating the Record

2006-03-28T19:24:00.000-05:00

Lawyers massage precedents, statutes and almost everything else in litigation. It's one of the reasons that they're so reviled, but, let's face it-- we've known for a while that interpretation is inherently and inescapably subjective. But yesterday Slate revealed legal manipulation that crosses the line into bad-faith, Jayson Blair land.

An issue complicating Hamdan is whether the Court has jurisdiction over it at all, given the Detainee Treatment Act that Congress passed in December. The DTA statute doesn't say clearly, reflecting the inability of legislators to agree. When a statute's implications are unclear, judges sometimes look to the law's legislative history-- ie, what Congresspeople said while introducing it, debating it and approving it. Thus, what is said and not said on the floor can be critical to divining the statute's purpose and, ergo, implications for a so-called enemy combatant's civil rights.

The Democratic sponsor of the DTA insisted, on the record, that the bill did not remove Hamdan from the Court's jurisdiction. The two Republican senators who co-sponsored the bill argue that it does, predictably enough. The problem is that the Republican sponsors didn't get their statements on the record, but inserted them after the bill was passed. In other words, they doctored the Congressional record after the fact. No legislator heard their arguments, and thus no one agreed, disagreed or debated on the record. But the governnment brief cites it, insistently, as evidence of legislative intent.

This is gross. I'd have gotten canned as a reporter if I'd done something like this.

New Song for Law School House Parties

2006-03-28T11:53:00.000-05:00

Yes, we law students are all dorks. Some less than others. But this song's so good that even my "hip" friends should dig it.

I Like Ike

2006-03-28T09:23:00.000-05:00

Last night, Jonathan and I saw "Why We Fight," a documentary about the military-industrial-Congressional-think-tank complex. Aside from its momentary demonization of the beast of "capitalism," the movie was damn good. It passed muster even with Jonathan, who is skeptical of jeremiads of any sort.

Here's the boiled-down version:

Dwight Eisenhower, five star-general in WWII and president from 1953 to 1961, warned the country in his farewell address of a "military-industrial complex" that would seek "unwarranted influence" in government and could portend a "disastrous rise of misplaced power." He warned:

We must never let the weight of this combination endanger our liberties or democratic processes. We should take nothing for granted. Only an alert and knowledgeable citizenry can compel the proper meshing of the huge industrial and military machinery of defense with our peaceful methods and goals, so that security and liberty may prosper together.

The whole speech is worth reading, by the way. Eisenhower's eloquence, humility and, above all, decency stand in total contrast to our president's posturing arrogance.

Lo and behold, his predictions were spot-on. The military-industrial complex is entrenched in even the hearts of our most ostensibly pacifist politicians. Think tanks provide easy-to-digest ideology to prop it up. Reporters eager for front-page stories hype up threats. We assuage our consciences by telling ourselves that smart bombs prevent civilian deaths. Why do we fight? It's as if we have no alternative-- that behemoth must feast, and it's finely enough tuned to thwart any obstacle.

None of this is new, but seeing it on screen is just horrifying. After seeing the movie, one of my friends sent out a plaintive email to a group of friends, exhorting us to "do something." I second the sentiment but doubt that much of anything can be done--the MI complex is just too sophisticated and big. (Sorry, friend!) I predict that we're headed for self and possibly world annihilation. From the ashes, perhaps, something decent will rise up. I hope I change my mind.

Gitmo (detainees outta there)

2006-03-27T10:22:00.000-05:00

Scalia: Guantanamo detainees with civil court rights, my ass!!

The big question here is-- and indulge me, please-- whether Scalia's comments to some Swiss law students will disqualify him from participating in the Hamdan v. Rumsfeld case, to be heard tomorrow. Chief Justice Roberts isn't, as he wrote the appellate opinion up for review. If Scalia's gone, that would leave only Thomas and Alito holding down the staunch-conservative fort.

To blog, perchance to dream....

Buy This Book!!

2006-03-22T10:38:00.000-05:00

I don't know much about baseball, let alone the fantasy kind. In fact, I once came face-to-face with a Strat-o-Matic and ran out of the room, screaming.

But I do know that Sam Walker is a terrific writer and reporter-- funny, astute, gifted in all things metaphor. Plus he's in the Pooja Hall of Fame for Favorite People. Plus his book aobut fantasy baseball weirdos is getting outta-the-park reviews. So if you have any interest in the Great American Pastime (read: freaky subcultures), buy it!

Cutting

2006-03-21T15:33:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the first official day of spring, and though last night's winds slapped my face, the weather seems to have gotten its act together today. It's glorious! Nothing can beat Cambridge for the clear azure skies.

Accordingly, I decided to cut my Local Government law class and to bask in the sun and the glory that is being a third-year law student. On Saturday, I realized that I will actually have to work next year-- and said realization hurt!! The student life has allowed me to postpone thinking about the world of work, and though a firm hired me months ago, I had been living in my own delusional, madcap world-- reading what I wanted, when I wanted; ditto writing; ditto talking; ditto thinking. Busting 80 hour weeks reading documents, advising, like, the insurance industry, supplicating to partners-- that, I realized, is what I signed on for. WHAT WAS I THINKING???

More cutting seemed in order. So next, I cut eight inches. Check it out, kiddos!

What say you? Shall I go shorter?

My Genius Sister

2006-03-20T21:38:00.000-05:00

Answer: This beautiful, brilliant Californian just scored a spot on Jeopardy! on April 17.

Question: My sister, Priya B. Yerasi!!!!

EDIT (with thanks to Carl):
Question: Who is my sister, Priya B. Yerasi?

Three Years On

2006-03-17T11:00:00.000-05:00

We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it.We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it. We broke it, we own it.

George Redeemed

2006-03-16T10:37:00.000-05:00

George Clooney disavows his ill-formed prose, reports Page Six:

On Monday, a blog ... ostensibly written by Clooney, was posted on the site. But it turns out the quotes were compiled from Clooney interviews. "Miss Huffington's blog is purposefully misleading," Clooney said yesterday.

Aw, George, I'm sorry I lost my faith in you. That language, which I excerpted on Monday, was too bad to be true.

Tiffination

2006-03-15T09:35:00.000-05:00

Indians are taking over the world!! The Times reports that Mumbai's dhabbawallas are making inroads in the Bay Area and New York. Admittedly, the U.S. version of the lunch-delivery system lacks the elegance of the original, a 120-year-old trade in which men transport some 200,000 tiffins (lunch boxes), prepared by mothers or wives or kitchen servants, to office workers in downtown Mumbai. Over here, it's just a glorified, home-cooked take-out service. But the article does confirm one thing I've been telling my friends for years: restaurant Indian food cannot compare to Mom's.

The Pill of Eating and Forgetting

2006-03-14T10:14:00.000-05:00

The sleep drug Ambien has created a class of ravenous zombies. Apparently they sleepwalk to the kitchen, consume thousands of calories, and stumble back to bed. In the morning, the somnophages have no memory of their eating.

Judie Evans said she began taking Ambien while recovering from back surgery. At the time, she was in a full body cast and needed assistance to get out of bed. During this time, Ms. Evans, who is 59 and lives alone, began to notice that food was missing from her refrigerator. She accused two nursing aides who were caring for her of stealing food. It was not until her son came to spend several nights that Ms. Evans said she realized that despite the body cast, she was getting up to eat while she was asleep. "During the day, I couldn't even make it to the bathroom by myself," Ms. Evans said. The first night her son was there, he found her standing in the kitchen, body cast and all, frying bacon and eggs. The next night he found her eating a sandwich, Ms. Evans said, and sent her back to bed.

Unconscious gluttony: American consumers at their best!

Getting Over Star Fucking

2006-03-13T21:42:00.000-05:00

On my 26th birthday, I dined on tapas and swigged sangria with a bunch of friends. Around 1am, Jonathan and I ended up at Cipriani Downtown, canoodling over chocolate torte. At the next table sat George Clooney, who was totally checking me out. Fuck it, he was making love to me with his eyes. Either that, or he was leering at the torte. Anyway, I've been swoony for Clooney ever since-- rakish, smoldering, swarthy, suave, playful George.

Today, however, came the awful truth. GC is a horrible, horrible writer! Even genuine passion cannot excuse writing like this:

But turn away from saying "I'm a liberal" and it's like you're turning away from saying that blacks should be allowed to sit in the front of the bus, that women should be able to vote and get paid the same as a man, that McCarthy was wrong, that Vietnam was a mistake. And that Saddam Hussein had no ties to al-Qaeda and had nothing to do with 9/11.

What's a girl to do?

The Theory? It's All for the Ladies

2006-03-13T09:05:00.000-05:00

Slavoj Zizek has it all: A name that you have to hear to pronounce correctly (try Jhee-Jek); a new, ga-ga-for-you, quasi-demogoguish documentary; and, even a "Go Atheists!" editorial in the Sunday Times.

And let's not even talk about his hot new Argentine wife!

Any predictions on when he'll jump the shark?

Memories

2006-03-11T01:37:00.000-05:00

This guy looks like:
my father (with more hair)
an uncle or two
my criminal law professor
an ex-boyfriend, in 20 years

Ah, so sad. His name is Ali Qaissi, and he's only 43, and he says he's the guy in the picture he's holding, and now he's a prisoners' rights activist. "I forgive the people who did these things to us," he told the reporter. "But I want their help in preventing these sorts of atrocities from continuing."

I find this picture odd-- given Qaissi's superhuman magnamity and that he's worked so hard to recover his dignity and to help restore it to thousands of detainees, why are his eyes downcast?

Schadenfreude!?!

2006-03-10T09:27:00.000-05:00

When a rival stumbles or enemy falls, I don't get gleeful; instead, I suddenly realize that my adversary is a person, too, and often I start to hurt for him or her. Weakness disarms me. I wanted to cry when Saddam Hussein, looking like a homeless person, was forced to submit to medical examinations on video. I spent months hating Judith Miller, the Times reporter who cozied up to Scooter Libby and planted the administration's false WMD stories in her paper-- until she became an object of universal derision. And that imperious future Stepford Wife in my Negotiation class? Saw her cry and fell in love.

So I guess I shouldn't be surprised about my muddled reaction to the news that George W. Bush's ratings have fallen to an all-time low of 37 percent. Don't get me wrong-- I don't feel sorry for him: he's used too much power too destructively and he's too egregiously abused the public trust. But, like Tony Kushner, I used to fantasize about someone assassinating him!

Maybe what I'm feeling is that it's too-little-too-late: the American people have only NOW wised up to W's incompetence and power lust. If only it'd happened six years ago.

Stop Smoking, Start Chewing

2006-03-09T09:12:00.000-05:00

Newspapers report, gleefully, that American smoking rates have plummeted to levels not seen since the 1950s. Researchers credit the massive public health campaign that began 20 years ago, the multi-billion dollar tobacky settlement (which raised both awareness and cigarette prices), and the smoking bans cities and states have enacted.

I've got another hypothesis: Nicotine gum. I quit smoking months ago-- which I'm quite happy about-- but my Nicorette consumption has spiraled out of control. I pound at least a dozen pieces a day-- more when I'm working on a paper-- which means I'm taking in much more nicotine than I ever did when I smoked. I'm like a former junkie addicted to meth.

And it's not just me. Check out this concerned wife, who complains that her erstwhile smoker spouse has a tizzy when he doesn't have his gum. Last year, I took two classes from a professor who popped the junk like no one's business. (But only in his long, long classes, when he couldn't take a real smoking break outside.) And a friend from New York-- who has his MD-- got hooked on the stuff even though he's never had a cigarette.

Maybe I should bring a class action lawsuit against GlaxoSmithKline, which boasts that its gums are softer, mintier and easier to chew than any others.

Oh, God, Nicorette is turning me into an ambulance chaser!

Let Me Be Clear: Extraordinary Perdition

2006-03-09T08:27:00.000-05:00

The U.S. Department of State released its annual Human Rights report yesterday. It was promptly ripped by NGOs like Amnesty International because, like each of its predecessors, it kept mum about U.S. practices. Hey, it even accused Egypt and Jordan of torturing detainees, but failed to admit that some of the torturees might have been shipped over by the U.S.

"Let me be clear: We do not send detainees to countries if we believe that they will be subjected to torture," said the assistant secretary for human rights at the press conference. Funny, almost every claim administration that officials preface with "Let me be clear" is blatantly false. I never know whether to laugh, cry or just shake my head. Thank goodness for blogs.

One More Thing, and an Explanation

2006-03-03T17:08:00.000-05:00

Denver, Colorado: Refuge for Bollywood stars. "I don't get mobbed here," say Madhuri Dixit.

Okay, that's all. I haven't been posting this week because a draft of my 3L paper (read: bullshit requirement they give us to think we're getting our tuition's worth) is due tomorrow. I've only begun writing it. But yes, it will be the bomb: It's about how modern marriage reproduces the social hierarchy even while claiming to transgress it. Yeah, baby. Give me some Bourdieu!!

I will post a more polished version here when that happens. Meanwhile, wish me luck. It's going to be a long weekend.

surrogate posting

2006-03-03T17:02:00.000-05:00

I am letting my friend Irina do my work today.

Thanks, doll! I hear you!

American Nightmare

2006-02-27T19:25:00.000-05:00

My desis are letting me down:

People who know Mr. Bush say he has an interest in [India] through little-known personal and political connections in Texas. While he was governor, Mr. Bush befriended a number of prosperous Indian doctors and businessmen, all Republicans, who captivated him as embodiments of the American dream and contributed handsomely to his campaigns.

Well, what can you expect from Texans? The Hindu ones probably all eat big steaks every night, too.

Attention non (naan?)- Injuns: We are not all like this. I, like many second-generation Indians, much prefer Fellow Tribal Members like Prime Minister Singh's daughter, who is at the ACLU, battling Bush on torture and detainees.

The Vast Left-Wing, Islamo-Pacifist Conspiracy

2006-02-23T12:43:00.000-05:00

Recently published on the Atlasphere:

"...September 11 electrified the Left. More than a decade after the fall of the Berlin Wall, there was once again someone whose thinking about the West and capitalism agreed with its own. Most importantly, Islamists possessed the will and capability to destabilize or perhaps even bring down the object of their hate.

"Sensing the opportunity, the Left immediately sprang to action. The first order of business was to dampen the retaliatory wrath of the United States. The effort was already underway on September 12 when a missive appeared on a popular leftist website urging restraint in responding to the attack.

"Since then the Left has done everything it could to undermine our efforts in the War on Terror. Because of its crucial importance, opposition to the American military is once again their rallying cry. Portraying it as an instrument of domination and our troops as reprobates, they try to discredit it in the public’s eyes. Complaining of its bad image, they themselves do all they can to blacken it. "

How did I happen upon this fount of wisdom and vitriol, you ask? Well, Jonathan bought me a copy of "Atlas Shrugged" for my birthday, and at his request I read most of it. I never finished it--- Dagny's superhuman efficiency and productivity was starting to make me feel worthless-- and Googled it to see what happens at the end. (Sorry, J.) What I found was the Atlasphere, a community of Ayn Rand admirers. The site publishes libertarian-esque opinion pieces, but more interestingly, has an internet dating feature!!!

I registered immediately. In the few days since, I've already received a smile from a fellow traveler-- one "AJ Saraf" from Houston, Tex. I won't smile back, of course, becasue I already have a libertarian lover to deal with. Sorry, AJ!

Statistics You Probably Won't See in the Papers

2006-02-22T17:57:00.000-05:00

A reader wonders whether Human Rights First's report on the treatment of detainees held by the US will make the front page of a U.S. newspaper. What a wonderful world that would be! Sadly but unsuprisingly, it hasn't seem to have made any of today's papers: Google News has no hits for "Human Rights First" today.

I'll monitor the news and keep you updated. Meanwhile, some tasty tidbits from the report.

98 detainee deaths in U.S. custody
45 suspected or confirmed homicides. Thirty-four deaths were homicides under the U.S. military’s definition; Human Rights First found 11 additional cases where the facts suggest death as a result of physical abuse or harsh conditions of detention.
In 48 cases – close to half of all the cases – the cause of death remains officially undetermined or unannounced.
Certainly 8, as many as 12, people were tortured to death.
Only 12 deaths have resulted in any kind of punishment.
The highest punishment for a torture-related death: 5 months confinement.

Return of Titid

2006-02-22T17:47:00.000-05:00

I am not sure what to make of Jean-Bertrand Aristide's planned return to Haiti. I empathize with the man and with his supporters, whose democratic rights have been trampled on for years, but something tells me this return cannot be good. If Aristide treats Preval as a puppet, as he has in the past, Preval will lose any shred of support with the ruling elite that he may have. Without the elite's support-- or at least, toleration-- a Haitian ruler has no chance. Even worse, Aristide's move would confirm to his detractors that he is the powerlusting, dictator-in-the-making they say he is.

Maybe, Patrice, you don't need to replace the Aristide sticker on your Nalgene with a Preval one, after all.

Haven't They Been Feeding You at Prison Camp?

2006-02-21T22:49:00.000-05:00

The United States has now admitted that hunger strikers at Guantanamo have been force fed, usually by strapping the prisoners to restraining chairs, and, at regular intervals, shoving tubes down their throats and up their noses and pumping liquid nourishment in at belly-bursting velocities and volumes.

Not only is this treatment considered by many American gourmands too inhumane for geese; it's also absurdly hypocritical: Guantanamo officials are torturing detainees to prevent them from dying.

Maybe I am being too unsympathetic-- after all, what's wrong with a little torture to preserve peace and quiet? According to military official, the hunger strikes had to be stopped "because they were having a disruptive effect and causing stress for the medical staff."

Summers's Fall and a Newsie's Revenge

2006-02-21T10:17:00.000-05:00

The Wall Street Journal breaks the news that Harvard President Larry Summers is set to resign this week. To me, though, the story is less interesting than its precocious co-author. Zachary Steward was until earlier this month the managing editor of Harvard's newspaper, the Crimson. He resigned because the college's disciplinary board forced him to take a leave of absence from school and from the paper; his grades were suffering.

Bet those administrators are regretting that move now that Zach has a national forum in which to air their dirty laundry.

Sympathy for a Jew-Hater

2006-02-20T16:17:00.000-05:00

An Austrian court today sentenced David Irving to three years in prison for "denying" the Holocaust. Perverse! No doubt all the publicity that has attended Irving's trial has fanned the embers of anti-Semitism 'round the world and given his book (and theories) a jump in sales and influence.

I'm neither free-speech absolutist nor, G-d forbid, anti-Semite (I LOVE the Jews, one in particular)-- but I think this sentence is disproportionate and self-defeating. Thoughts?

Preval Prevails, But Questions Lurk

2006-02-17T17:52:00.001-05:00

Really, what the hell happened? A friend sends this account from the Miami Herald, which offers this chronology of events and points up the leverage that France, Canada and the U.S. had in resolving the electoral crisis.

I don't doubt that "irregularities" marred the election-- Preval was expected to win in a landslide, according to observers and poll-watchers, and all those blank ballots were suspicious. But I worry that Preval's government will be shadowed by illegitimacy and, indeed, even more dependent on fair-weather friends (France, the US, Canada) that usually leave the Haitian left in the lurch. Consider, for instance, yesterday's barely-veiled threat from my nemesis, Roger Noriega:

"Haitians have suffered the consequences when, not too long ago, they were denied legitimate government because outsiders pronounced slip-shod elections as ''good enough'' for Haiti. Now, violent mobs may be trying to convince those tallying the ballots that 49 percent is ``good enough."... Préval's opponents--roughly half the population--will have every reason to reject the legitimacy of a leader who counted on a mob to seal his victory."

So much for power to the people. Like his predecesor, Preval is under our thumbs.

Lawyers are Whores

2006-02-17T16:03:00.000-05:00

Cheney's unintended target expressed sympathy for him today, in the lawyer's first public appearance since the shooting. Said Mr. Whittington:

"I'm deeply sorry for all that the vice president has gone through this week, especially because getting shot felt so damn good. Almost as good as the heart attack that followed it. I love Dick and the way his bullets fill me."

Okay, not really. But he did a very smooth job of making the vice president the victim here.

Chronically Depressed Democrats and Ignorantly Blissful Republicans

2006-02-17T11:05:00.000-05:00

The Pew Research Center reports that 45 percent of Republicans say they're "very happy," compared with only 30 percent of Democrats. Is it because the GOP controls all three branches of government? Unlikely: Republicans have polled happier than Democrats ever since 1972. Yes, even during those Golden Clinton years. And yes, even when controlled for income (the rich are likelier to report being happy than are the poor).

So, there's an inverse relationship between leftiness and happiness. Well, the Pew Center should next investigate the correlation between partisan preferences and IQ. I hypothesize they'll find a direct relationship between conservativeness and stupidity.

My J-Date

2006-02-15T22:05:00.000-05:00

One more thing: I have been summoned to jury service in Lowell, Mass., tomorrow at 8:30am sharp. Wish me luck--I'd rather not be a chosen one.

Will Preval Prevail?

2006-02-15T21:33:00.000-05:00

A reader sends this email:

"There is something that I have been wondering about that you touched on in your blog. Perhaps you can clarify the matter for me. Preval appears to have won 48% of the vote in as orderly an election as Haiti could possibly conduct. He will win the second ballot. Shouldn't his supporters be celebrating instead of rioting?"

It's a good question. I have a few theories.

First, most of the electorate is frustrated and deeply disenchanted with democracy. In a sense, the masses voted 16 years ago for their leader, but they never really got him. In Haiti, electoral power has rarely translated into political power.

Second, I'd wager that a runoff or any other delay would jeopardize Preval's chances. The leading opposition candidate-- Leslie Maginat, with 12% of the vote--would have more time to get his vote machines churning. Indeed, one of the right-wing justifications for the numerous delays of the Haitian elections was that with more time, candidates besides Preval would have a better chance.

Third, and perhaps most important, the elections may not have been as orderly as the reader imagines. Preval's supporters claim fraud, apparently not without merit: Upwards of 200,000 ballots have been voided or were blank.

Those are my theories. Please share yours.

Recherche du Chapeau Perdu

2006-02-15T20:26:00.000-05:00

Tis the season of loss.

You know about my computer. (And by the way, I've already replaced it with a sleek, bargain-basement iBook, which I shall keep dustcloth covered and far from food and drink and grimies for its life.) Two pairs of cheap sunglasses. One credit card. But last night I sustained the most devastating loss yet: my hat.

That conspicuous white sheepskin number always made me feel a bit like Julie Christie in Dr. Zhivago. I donned it whenever the thermostat dipped below 40 degrees. I engaged in pre-wedding bhangra in a parking lot in December, clad only in a sari and my hat. Construction workers whistled at me when I wore it.

When Jonathan picked me up from school last night, I had it on. When we left The Best Pizza Place in the World last night, I didn't. Four big slices inside my belly, I mustered as much alacrity as I could and waddled back to the restaurant. Bob the Waiter said he'd not seen it. It was not in Jonathan's car, nor was it on the sidewalk where he picked me up.

Questionable motives lurk all around: Bob the Waiter, for one, is bald as a pin. All my coolest girlfriends coveted the hat. Jonathan despised it. But I don't believe any of them would lack the sense of humanity required take Zhivago from me. I believe the Hat Demon done snatched it.

He has struck before. Once, with my first white sheepskin hat (whose loss caused me to buy Zhivago from eBay last year); then, with an black wool gizmo tricked out with under-chin-ties and a pom-pom.

Poor me, bereft and bareheaded.

Shameless

2006-02-15T14:09:00.000-05:00

An Australian television station has aired new Abu Ghraib images, taken in 2003. The United States' reaction?

"US defence department spokesman Bryan Whitman said the images 'could only further inflame and possibly incite unnecessary violence in the world.' He said: '[The images] would endanger our military men and women.'"

The U.S. has taken that old saw, "The best defense is an offense" way too far.

Hope Extinguished

2006-02-14T20:02:00.000-05:00

To recap:

Haiti held presidential and legislative elections on Feb. 7. Preliminary results indicated that Rene Preval, the candidate of the masses, had a sizeable lead, and the soothsayers portended that he would easily gain the 50 percent plus one vote required to become Haiti's next president.

The masses rejoiced, and no wonder: 65 percent of Haitians live below the poverty line, and their will has been repeatedly and systematically undermined by the United States. Preval's apparent sweep seemed like a new start. A few days after the election, a very qualified calm swept Port-au-Prince.

"David Wimhurst, a spokesman for the United Nations Stabilization Mission, offered some statistics. Troops posted in and around Cité Soleil, a violent slum here in the capital, fired fewer than 700 rounds this week, compared with 4,000 rounds the week before, he said. There were only four kidnappings this week, he said, half the daily average just two weeks ago."

Twas not to last. With 90 percent of the vote tabulated, Preval looks to have received around only 48 percent. Tires are burning again, the masses are crying foul, and one might predict that the "peacekeepers" will fire at least 4,000 rounds this week.

We shouldn't be surprised. After all, any election that resulted in the victory of a candidate of the masses could not have been legitimate, at least not to the puppetmasters.

Falling Apart

2006-02-14T11:20:00.000-05:00

HELP!!!! The folks at IBM called to say that all the damage to my computer was MY FAULT (!) and that they will not pay the $895 required to fix it. I am devastated. Will I be able to retrieve the songs and pictures and poetry (and school stuff, too) from my hard drive? And what shall I do in the interim? My blog is, as you well know, pallid and peaked of late, and my procrastinative urges are building up intolerably. I could barely even write my papers, were I inclined to do so. And when I get a new computer (the only silver lining here...truthfully, I had abused my laptop to no end), which one should it be?

Alas, too, for the news is getting ahead of us all. Aside from the shit going down in Haiti, Dick's hunting accident and Saddam's hunger strike, all of which, inshallah, I will get to this evening, I have a rather more poignant story.

I spent the weekend in New York, and though the mammoth snowstorm delayed my return to Cambridge, I was determined to make it back in time for my 4:30 class on Monday. (Grading is discretionary in classes of fewer than 40 people, as I discovered recently and in a most unfortunate manner.) I flagged down a cab from Back Bay station. Most cab drivers in Boston are immigrants, so I guess it makes sense that most of them ask me where I'm from. I answered as usual ("Iowa, but my parents came from India") and asked my driver, Salah, where he was from.

"Hahahaha!!!" he said with a nervous little laugh. "I'm from the land of the Arabian Nights!"

"Like, from where? Which country?"

"Ahem. The Arabian peninsula."

Salah's hedging made me suspect he was from Iraq. He was, as it turns out. He came to the States after the Iran-Iraq war-- in which he fought-- and just before the start of the first Iraqi invasion. I told him that I was so, so sorry for what the United States has done to his country and then I lost my words. I couldn't find words-- and still can't-- to express the mix of anger and grief and sorryness and shame that I felt. I asked if he still had family there. "Everyone," Salah said. "But I don't know who remains, because it is too hard to talk with them."

By then I was at school. Salah said, "God be with you" and held his hands as if in prayer. He tried to refuse to take my fare.

At the risk of belaboring the story, let me point out two things that break my heart: First, Salah's reluctance to tell me where he was from. Such shame and fear from a former soldier! Second, his reaction to my totally inadequate and bumbling expression of condolences.

God be with you, Salah.

Way Ahead of My Time

2006-02-08T20:45:00.000-05:00

I pitched this story at the Journal THREE FUCKING YEARS AGO!!!

The lesson: Lifestyle journalism sucks.

Lousiana Refund

2006-02-08T20:25:00.001-05:00

New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin is soliciting foreign aid to help reconstruct his city. King Abdullah of Jordan gets the Lower Ninth Ward!!! The French get Treme!!! Should Ireland get the Irish Channel?

Speaking of New Orleans, my former supervisor at the Louisiana Capital Assistance Center, a death penalty advocacy outfit, sent round this notice: They're looking for lawyers to deal with the yukky aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, in which loads of (mostly black and all poor) people have been unconstitutionally imprisoned.

Mohammed, Pat Robertson and Sartre Walk into a Bar

2006-02-08T19:46:00.000-05:00

Two days without a working computer is tough. My poor little laptop kept fritzing-- including, once, during one of my fall exams-- and I have sent it off to IBM headquarters in Memphis for some fixing. I know that my absence has been rough on my devoted readership, all two of you, but hang tight: I should get the computer back on Friday. Meanwhile, I'm working in the hallowed, halogen lighted halls of Harvard's law library.

My marvelous, charming cousin Manu (whose lovely wife is dancing alongside him in this photo) sends a link to this wacked-out screed against fundamentalist Muslims. The writer seems to think they have too-big a chip on their shoulders. [Don't worry, M-- I quite understand you by no means endorse it.] Well, as my marvelous, charming cousin Bobby (whose lovely wife is standing beside him here) points out out, that chip just resembles the one that Jews and others have about the Holocaust.

Blah, blah, blah. The situation is too absurd, sad and seemingly intractable to deal with constructively and you know, we are Too Small to Make a Difference, so we're moving on. To...Pat Robertson, who most usefully reminds us that if Muslims are taking over the world, it's all Sartre's fault. Apparently, Europeans are committing autocide by reading too much existentialism. (I can see his point: someone like Bourdieu is much sexier.)

An Arab, a Christian and a Jew Walk into a Bar

2006-02-06T18:26:00.000-05:00

The Lampoon war has begun!

The Guardian reports that the Danish newspaper that published the incendiary cartoons of Mohammed passed on cartoons of Jesus three years ago, worrying that they'd inflame the readership. Fucking imbeciles. It's Islam, not Christianity, that has the major icon taboo!

In response to cartoons, Iran's best-selling newspaper has announced a Holocaust-cartoon contest. Fucking imbeciles. The Jews had nothing to do with this!

Marching Saints

2006-02-04T17:38:00.000-05:00

On my must read list: Taylor Branch's At Cannan's Edge. Anthony Lewis has a super review of the MLK biography in the Times this week. If the book sounds hagiography, all the better-- we need a modern-day saint.

You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

2006-02-04T12:28:00.000-05:00

I saw Brokeback Mountain a month or so ago, and though I genuinely appreciated the fact that it broke new ground, I was hardly as enraptured as the critics. To be sure, it was beautifully shot, well acted and faithful to the brilliant Annie Proulx story on which it was based. But the reviews rang false in a very politically correct kind of way. I thought of Brokeback Mountain as the "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" for the civil rights issue of our time-- an attempt to bring gay love into the mainstream and make it palatable for middle-class audiences.

Therefore, Daniel Mendelsohn's appraisal in the New York Review of Books was a revelation. In it, he writes that Brokeback Mountain is not a "universal love story," as critics would have it. Rather, it is specifically about the tragedy of being closeted: the self-loathing and shame that result from and in the denial of erotic attachment. It shows, as he writes, how the tragedy of the closet can lay waste to whole families. Heath Ledger's portrayal of Ennis Del Mar-- mumbling, shuffling, stooped, inarticulate-- thorougly reveals his inability to be fully human. His last line in the movie--"Jack, I swear...."-- remains incomplete, just like his life. The cinematography, meanwhile, is full of motifs on the theme of confinement, Mendelsohn writes. The lovers are truly happy only in the brief time they're in the open, playing in expansive fields under a wide blue sky. The rest of the movie shows them in small places-- stuck in a tiny house, a too-small chair, framed against a tiny window or reflected in a small mirror. It is telling that the movie's climaxes occur in two closets.

Thanks, Mr. Mendelsohn, for a truly enlightening piece of criticsm.

Maths for the Weekend

2006-02-03T08:08:00.000-05:00

Since September 2001, the Bush administration has spent or plans to spend more than $450 billion-- nearly half a trillion dollars-- on military operations in Iraq and Afghanistan.

How to fathom this number?

400 times larger than the amount the US has spent or plans to spend on aid to Haiti in the twelve years since 1995.
More than 100 times Haiti's GDP.
Equivalent to the annual starting salaries of 10 million WSJ reporters
$75 a person in the world
Almost 9 times Bill Gates' net worth
$15 million per dead Iraqi civilian, per W's only public estimate
$4.5 million per dead Iraqi civilian, per the Lancet's estimate
$150 million per US civilian killed in the Sept 2001 attacks
$450 billion times too much

One of These Hoodlums Could Be President

2006-02-02T11:42:00.000-05:00

Specifically, the one in the ski mask.

Bastard Indians

2006-02-02T11:06:00.000-05:00

The Times today reviews a book about the history of curry. It confirms, as postcolonial writers from G.V. Desani to Salman Rushdie have told us for years, that Indian food, language and, hell, nation is a just a sublime mishmash. To wit: The Portugese brought to Goa a meat dish with vinegar and garlic, or "vinho e alhos." Indian cooks, lacking wine vinegar, substituted tamarind sauce and peppers and rechristened the dish "vindaloo." Whoo-hoo, vin-da-LOOOOO!!!!!

The book also discloses that ketchup was originally made with MUSHROOMS!

For more on the mating of Indian and Western tongues, this etymologically delicious Anglo-Indian dictionary, and find out where words like juggernaut, pajamas, junk and bungalow come from.

No One Takes Him Seriously!!

2006-01-31T21:43:00.000-05:00

Big applause line: "Congress did not pass my plan to overhaul social security."

Damn, with all those hoots and hollers from the left side of the aisle, the chambers looks like British Parliament. Maybe people will start liking Democrats more if they keep up the genuine, well-timed impertinence.

Displatch #1

2006-01-31T21:13:00.000-05:00

9:16pm: He actually used the phrase Weapons of Mass Destruction. Thought that term no longer passed the straight-face test. Dammit Iran!

Incidentally, Slate has a nice piece about the parody-of-itself the SOTU address has become.

9:19pm: The continuing rhetorical power of the "we must fight terrorism abroad or else the vicious attackers bring the battle here" line astounds, given its logical inadequacies. The Iraq war has done a lot more for Al Qaeda's recruiting and retention than for the United States military's.

9:27pm: Never trust a man with beady eyes

9:32pm: Can't deal with his appropriating human rights discourse. Big problem.

9:35pm: Never trust a man with a crooked smile

9:40pm: Does he not realize that the camera is on him even when he's not talking, recording his smirks and winks?

9:41pm: That's all for me. Good night.

SOTU

2006-01-31T21:10:00.000-05:00

A few predictions while the red carpet kissass is going on:

1) Little little things-- there's no new world order to announce, no money in the coffers for grand initiatives.

2) Maybe some defense of critics, probably some falsely persuasive admitting mistakes stuff

3) I won't be able to stomach more than 30 minutes.

Making a Mockery of the Court

2006-01-30T16:51:00.000-05:00

The Cairo-based Federation of Arab Lawyers plans a mock trial of George W. Bush, Tony Blair and Ariel Sharon for war crimes committed against Iraqi and Palestinian civilians. Ramsey Clark, reportedly, is putting on his prosecutor's hat for this one, and the organizers claim that Nelson Mandela will show up if he feels well.

Meanwhile, Saddam Hussein's lawyer claims he is filing a suit against Bush, Blair and Donald Rumsfeld in the ICC, demanding half a million dollars for each Iraqi who's lost a relative or property during the war. Also wants remedies for Abu Ghraib torture victims.

Laugh all you want, but you'd be hard pressed to convince me that either of these is less absurd than Hussein's trial in Baghdad. Boycotts, assassinations, impotent judges, theatrics.

Chimères of Washington

2006-01-29T20:51:00.000-05:00

Maybe the NYT is reading my blog!!

The Times today runs a long-overdue post-mortem on the chaos in Haiti and-- amazingly-- puts it on the front page of the Sunday edition, above the fold, then lets it ramble on for three full pages inside. The upshot is that the US-backed International Republican Institute fomented the 2004 coup by sending support-- money, training, winks and nods-- to the opposition and by stymying negotations between Aristide and the opposition. The IRI also may have had shady dealings with Guy Philippe, drug-runner extraordinaire, before he led the revolt that unseated Aristide.

This is solid reporting, and certainly welcome, but it announces nothing new of note. I agree with my human rights professor, Jim Cavallaro, who is happy to have his so-called conspiracy theories legitmated. But why didn't the Times whip this out a year ago?

And why doesn't the paper have a full-time reporter on the Haiti/ Caribbean beat? (Note to the NYT honchos who undoubtedly are reading this: I could be yours after I graduate in June.)

On a somewhat happier note, the Haitian "authorities" have finally released Fr. Gerard Jean-Juste, whom Amnesty International called a prisoner of conscience, from a Port-au-Prince jail where he's been languishing for months. He's en route to Miami for-- less happily-- leukemia treatment.

De-Pressing Haiti

2006-01-24T10:23:00.000-05:00

Stop the presses: Today the New York Times ran an article about Haiti!

The Times usually ignores that chronically failing state, just an hour-long flight from Miami. I'd estimate it's run fewer than a dozen full-length features about Haiti since the coup in 2004. And there are stories upon stories there. A few weeks ago, the head of the UN peacekeeping mission apparently killed himself. The number of kidnappings in Port-au-Prince rivals those in Baghdad. Stooges in the temporary government have imprisoned a major contender for political power on trumped up charges.

I'm not arguing here that the US's flagship paper has an obligation to run stories about Haiti. I'm just saying those stories are damn good and easy to get.

More Terror from Turd Blossom

2006-01-20T18:11:00.000-05:00

Underlining the GOP's endorsement of cruel and usual punishment, Karl Rove instructed his party to devote their campaign energies to....the War on Terrorism!!!

Please don't tell me that my fellow Americans will still buy this crap. Please. Please.

Same-Sex Love in Massachusetts

2006-01-19T22:02:00.000-05:00

Big news for Bostonians: Wunderkind Theo Epstein will return to the Red Sox.

From the official press release:

"Ironically, Theo's departure has brought us closer together in many respects, and, thanks to these conversations, we now enjoy the bonds of a shared vision for the organization's future that did not exist on October 31."

It's like Brokeback Mountain got a happy ending.

Bin Laden vs. McClellan

2006-01-19T20:33:00.000-05:00

"Your minds will be troubled and your lives embittered. As for us, we have nothing to lose. A swimmer in the ocean does not fear the rain. You have occupied our lands, offended our honor and dignity and let out our blood and stolen our money and destroyed our houses and played with our security and we will give you the same treatment."
--Osama Bin Laden

"Clearly, al Qaeda and the terrorists are on the run ...And as I indicated, clearly, the al Qaeda leaders and the terrorists are on the run....I think, clearly, the leaders of al Qaeda and others are on the run...But we've got them on the run... I think, clearly, he is on the run ...We are winning this war on terrorism, the terrorists are on the run and we're going to continue ....He is someone who is clearly on the run...Well, as I indicated, he's clearly on the run... [Reporter: How do you know he's on the run?] I think it's clear from all indications..."
--Scottie McClellan

Credibility: Osama
Use of Metaphor: Osama
Looks: Osama
Pity Point: Scott
Diabolicalness: ??

Don't Kill Jill

2006-01-17T21:59:00.000-05:00

I didn't know Jill Carroll when she worked at the Journal. I hope that I will be able to meet her someday.

Returning from an interview with a Sunni leader, the 28-year-old foreign correspondent was ambushed. Ms. Carroll watched as her captors murdered her translator. Her driver escaped.

Today, Al-Jazeera aired a silent video showing Ms. Carroll speaking. Her kidnappers have threatened to kill her in 72 hours if Iraqi female prisoners are not released.

Her story is breath-bating and heart-breaking for me. She is about my age, worked at the WSJ when I did and represents many of the things I dreamed of being when I started in journalism: intrepid, diligent, and determined to uncover the real story and certain that its revelation will improve the world. See here for some of her stories and for a Ms. Carroll update.

Let's hope we can hear her first-person version of events soon.